from: https://www.quora.com/Im-totally-lost-after-a-5-year-software-career-What-is-some-advice
I hate to say this, but your story is just a more extreme version of what happens to almost every programmer.
At about 30, the majority of programmers experience burn-out. It can be very sudden. One day, they love it and the next day, they just can't be bothered.
I read an article over 30 years ago in a computer professional magazine about the possible causes of this problem and what could be done about it. They suggested three causes: The never-ending stress: everything is urgent and needs to be done the day before yesterday The long hours of intense concentration The poor diet - usually takeaways or junk food you can eat at your desk whilst continuing to program Sound familiar?
The article went on to say that if you're not out of this toxic environment by 30 at the latest, you're risking serious health issues. This has been borne out many times. Three of my friends are already dead (two died at 40 and one made it to 50) and many more have substance abuse issues just to handle their work.
They also went on to suggest that the best solution was to move out into management usually project management. Or something else entirely. It's amusing because since that time, I've been trying to get away from programming and computers in general and, much to the amusement of my friends, I've failed miserably and am still involved in some way. I tell people that every time I try to get out, the clients just wave a wad of cash at me and I say to myself "Well just one more project". But by limiting my interaction down to the minimum, I've managed to maintain my health and happiness.
Sadly, these words have come a bit late for you.
I'm going to have to get tough with you here: your days as a solo programmer are done - get over it.
But that doesn't necessarily mean that you're done with programming, if you don't wish to be.
Sit down with a piece of paper in front of you and ask yourself the following question: "What was it about programming that was so thrilling?"
Then answer it in minutest detail.
If you haven't got 15 points, then you're not trying.
Once you've completely answered that, get another piece of paper and ask yourself the following question "What was it about programming that hurt me so badly?"
Then answer that in minutest detail.
Once you've completely answered that, get another piece of paper and set yourself the following task: Write down a list of jobs that offer all of the first list and mark them for the number of things they contain on the second list.
Once you have a dozen or thereabouts, re-order them so you get all of the first list and the least number of things on the second list - preferably none of the second list.
Now pick the top 3 on that list.
If you've been honest with yourself and done this task correctly, those three options will give you everything that programming used to give you but without trying to kill you. And, if you really like programming, they're likely to be related to programming in some way.
Silicon Valley’s Dark Secret: It’s All About Age
Thanks for the A2A